First off, I’m a 23-year-old geek. And it’s not that I’m pug ugly or that I haven’t had girlfriends, because I’ve had a few. I earn a decent wage, live in a nice enough flatshare, but I keep getting dumped. It’s becoming the story of my life. There was the girl at work. That lasted two weeks before she told me that she didn’t feel comfortable with an office romance. Next thing, she was going out with my boss, and now they’re engaged! Then there was a lovely girl whose computer I fixed for free. She went back to her ex after a month. One girl dumped me after two days because I’m not a vegetarian. Another girl dumped me by email because she didn’t like the smell of my aftershave and I wouldn’t use the one she bought me. So what is it with women? Is it because they’re fickle? Or is it because dumping a bloke is as easy as taking an item back to the shop because you wore it once and didn’t like it? I’ve never really had the chance to get to know any of them properly, and I’ve never had sexual relations with any. I’ve bought flowers, and chocolates, but even that goes wrong because one girl told me she hates mixed carnations (which I bought at a garage), and another was a little bit overweight and thought I was trying to get her fatter. I just don’t seem to do anything right. The last time I had a girlfriend that lasted was a holiday romance when I was 10, and we stayed in touch for ages before she emigrated. What does a not bad bloke do to find a good woman, these days?

Barbara says: Good question, easy answer – you’re not going to find a soulmate or a bedmate until you learn what getting dumped is all about. It’s part of the trial and error system that we all have to go through to find out who loves us, and who’s just taking used clothing back to M&S. Some useful tips – if a woman buys you aftershave, use it. She’s trying to tell you that one turns her on. Never buy a woman carnations from a garage or supermarket – they look cheap. If you’re a meat eater, don’t do it in front of a vegetarian. And don’t ever do a professional job for nothing, because you think you’ll get something else out of it. Finally, girls often go back to exes, and go for Alpha Males, like your boss. Best of luck!