Last year, a “friend” of mine got married. She’s from the same part of Europe as I am. She’d run out of money as she was trying to do some part-time study, as well as work in the health service and someone came to her with an offer to marry this guy and collect a lot of cash.

He needed to get the right to stay in the UK. She’d never met him, but she went through with it, without having any idea who he was. She’d only met him once. But funnily enough, after this sham wedding, he eventually moved in with her, as you have to, and she got a soft spot for him. So they actually did start a relationship.

And in most senses now, he’s her kind of husband. She and I were very close. We were in a same-sex relationship, although not living together. Now I’m sensing that although she’s told him about what she has with me, what she has with him is getting stronger and stronger. I can see it happening.

He knows about me, and he’s not fighting with me over her, but I just know that she prefers him to me. I have to think about this. Do I try to get her back by reporting her sham marriage to immigration and getting both of them prosecuted? Or do I, and I can hardly bear the thought of this, move on, and leave them to get on with their lives together, even though it was all a fix in the first place?

Barbara says: Back off and don’t push this. If it’s going to be in the headlines, don’t be the person who put it there. I know that what I’m telling you isn’t adhering to the law of the land, exactly, but I’m asking you to allow the law of the land to play its own part, if and when. Get out of there and get a new love in your life. But be there, if you’re needed.