My wife never stops feeding me, or supplying me with food, but keeps on telling me I’m becoming fat and ugly.

I’m 42, an ex US Army and pro-football player, and I’m 420 pounds. That’s 30 stone. Everything’s getting too much for me. My knees are shot, my back’s shot. I can’t walk up stairs or bend down, I can’t sleep properly because I snore and wake myself up, and I can’t breathe in elevators. I can’t play with my kids, who are 14 and 11. I’m a wreck, and have been since I lot my job coaching football because of my injuries.

So I sit home nights, while she works as a nurse, and I watch TV, and apply for jobs online, and eat. I eat so much that even I’m embarrassed about it. We have some good savings from my years in the game, but money can’t buy you health, can it?

I just want to make love to my woman. I want to be with my kids. I want to be fit and healthy. But she buys chips and popcorn and cookies, and then yells at me for eating them. I’m home all day and I’m bored. What else is there to do?

Barbara says: Awwwww, come on! You know, usually I get letters like this from women who feel bad about turning into blobs but ‘can’t help it’. You were a professional sportsman. You have money, you have a brain, you’re used to working to schedules. Write a schedule. Shop with your wife. Choose only healthy foods. Book into a gym and do a daily workout.

Check out if your back and knee problems can be helped by the NHS or whatever. Stop giving in to boredom and feeling useless. And most of all, get a counsellor or coach, or both. Wake up! Save your life! It’s not your wife’s fault, it’s yours. Get that into your head.